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Johnny Saturn

This week we are pleased to welcome to the Good Idea Studios the Johnny Saturn Band!  Tyler, Sam, Shane, Jake, and Danny dropped by for a few drinks, and some basement tunage, along with some HHNT fuckery, we had a regulation ball!             You can listen to audio only HERE

The whole episode is above, so lets get straight to the story links.

We start with a Florida Man story, with a Twisted Tea connection. If you have a can of Twisted Tea in your pocket, are you carrying a concealed weapon?

Florida man armed with Twisted Tea & metal pipe threatens former employer
WATCH: Twisted Tea Can Smashed Into Head of Man Who Used N-Word at Circle K

Next we move south for a story of love and stabbing. and forgetting the past.

Confused, jealous wife stabs husband after seeing her younger self in old photos

So, that’s what you get for a nickle. Not bad eh?

Once again, we want to thank The Johnny Saturn Band for dropping by and laying some Live Music on us.

Don’t forget you can call us and leave your thoughts, and-or opinions by calling 701-369-0029. C’mon, give us a call. It won’t hurt, ….much.

Everybody stay warm and think responsibly.      PEACE    Sanchez E.

Welcome Back To The Show!

You can listen to the whole show HERE       This week we welcome back to the show Torey and Brenden for some cocktails and fuckery, along with a little music. They visited us about a year ago, and we had so much fun we asked them back.We mostly drank and joked  with a few regular stories stuck in for good measure.

As you can see, we video’d the first half of the show, and I would like to mention that Shanty does ALL of the editing for this mess, video and audio, and has gone into all of it with absolutely no experience. Needless to say, he has done an excellent job, and deserves a big ole “Atta Boy” for his efforts. He has a new computer for the video work, so hopefully, it is not such a stressful experience.

Of course our first story is a Florida Man one about a guy who just couldn’t stand the idea that somebody was a little different than him.

Police: Florida man abandoned child on roadside because he thought boy might be gay

We stick around in Florida for a related story about a woman who couldn’t seem to figure out the whole birth control thing.

Florida woman has abandoned three babies at apartment complexes since 2016

And here is the Stanhope reference I made.

This is when the liqueur started kicking in and things started to weird. I made some statements about Planned Parenthood that may not have been completely factual, so I have included a link that may have some better info. than either of us.

We then touched on the real story behind the movie Inglorious Basterds.

 

Next we move on to a story about a fella who is lucky he is alive!

Psychedelic Mushrooms Grew in a Man’s Veins After He Injected Them

We spend a while talking about the insanity behind the failed war on drugs.

Eat this one, you’ll never have to eat again

ALIENS—We talked about ALIENS!!!

Humuculus?

 

We had a caller check in and give us some advice for self care.

You too can be a guest on the show. Just call 701-369-0029, and leave your opinion and some contact info, and we will let you know how to get in on a recording session.

 

It was time for a very dark story about a North Dakota woman who needs some serious punishing for the crimes she committed!

Fargo woman arrested for toddler’s apparent gruesome death

We finally get to our last story about what a douche Columbus was (Scroll down on the linked page for the story) What an asshole. The whole bunch of them.

18. Christopher Columbus ran a sex slave ring with pre-pubescent Native American girls.

We get to the end of a real hoot of a show. The boys left us with a closing ditty that will find its way into many future shows.

So, that’s it for this week. We really want to thank Torey and Brenden for stopping by and getting hammer-pantsed with us. Remember to tune in to your favorite podcasts and share them with your friends. It’s Word Of Mouth that powers many of these shows, and you spreading the word is how we reach more listeners.

So, treat yourselves right, and show a little patients with those assholes that get on your nerves. See you next week.       PEACE   S.E.

Insert offensive Nick-Name here

Listen to this weeks episode HERE Greetings from the center of the North American continent! This is our first regular show of 2021, and we would like to welcome new listeners and those who have already decided to waste their time on this nonsense.  Tonight we run the gamut of stories you didn’t know you needed to hear. No video this week, as it seems that you need sd cards in ALL of the cameras in order for it to come out correctly. We recorded this weeks episode the day after the huge kerfuffle at the U.S.Capitol, and although we touched on some of it, I am not posting any links having to do with it. The TV news is flooded with it, so turn on your favorite mind control station if you want to see that shit.

So….My handle is Sanchez Eldorado, and the other half of this mess is Shanty Pants. One of us is 1/2 Mexican. (Spoiler, it’s not me) And his video gaming handle used to be “Beaner Point5” until, of course, Microsoft decided that it was “Offensive”. Offensive to who?  It’s not offensive to him. So, if you get offended easily, stick around, your going to love this shit!

 

We start the show with a short discussion about the storming of capitol on Wednesday. Of course —Florida Man!!!

Finally we get to our regularly scheduled program with a Good Cop story about a guy who, with a rational mind made a difference instead of an arrest.

Policeman buys family food instead of arresting them for shoplifting

 

More fluffy news about the little dog who got rescued by his owner out of the mouth of a gator

Florida dog that survived alligator attack named ‘deputy’ for sheriff’s office

Next we get to a real cat fight on the street, where one of the fighters decided to wear only a thong!

Two women were caught on video brawling in Miami Beach. One was wearing just a thong

So here are some links to some of our favorite podcasters    The Fumbled Penis  The Screaming Chuy Show  Law Offices of Quibble Squabble, and Bicker

Next we head back to Florida where you really need to be careful what you say around your brother.

Police: Florida man shoots brother in head after victim said he wanted to die

This next one is pretty dark. As in REAL DARK. Before World War , the Japanese had been occupying the city of Nanjing in China. The Japanese were not nice. The facts of this story are disturbing and disgusting. But they are FACTS.

During the Nanjing Massacre of 1937-38, soldiers severed the bellies of pregnant women, raped children and infants after cutting them open and even forced family members to rape each other.

So it was at this time The Pants realized that one of the cameras didn’t have a card in it.

Don’t forget You Too can be on the show if you call 701-369-0029, leave a message and be famous!

Lets talk about parenting. I am 63 years old. I know that things were different when I was a child, but when I was 9, I was no different than a 9 year old of today. I was mowing the lawn, going camping in the back yard with my buddies, and actually using the stove on my own. What a world where a Father is criticized for teaching his child to feed herself. There will be more to come on this one.

Outcry as ‘bean dad’ forces hungry child to open tin can

Florida. Is it the water? The weather? The meth?We may never know for sure, but we do know that this guy probably had too much of one of them.

Daytona transient pretends to be prosecutor, tries to drop charges against himself

Now to Australia, where if you are on the run, you should get naked and hide out in a crocodile infested swamp. Seems legit.

Fishermen rescue naked fugitive from crocodile-infested waters in Australia

This pastor/teacher took the name of his town to heart. Kissame Fla.

 

Kissimmee Teacher/Pastor Arrested For Dry Humping Coworker

So we leave you with this story about a guy that was arrested for stealing his buddies wallet. We suspect that his buddy had some fun before calling the cops on his drunk, passed out ass.

So that’s it for this week. Be sure to check out next week for a special show with special guests. And call dammit! 701-369-0029.    PEACE!

Lets Have A New Year!

This week we are in the Good Idea Studio with a small New Years Eve celebration. Tonight we welcome the one and only Shoee Doobee, along with his sweety Dana, and the neighbors Brekon and Kelly for a subdued episode we are calling “Butt Sex Drunk”.

We kick things off with a couple of voice messages from the   Happy Hour Phone Line (701-369-0029) and share the usual pleasantrys before we move on to the regular scheduled debauchery.

We begin with a couple of updates from previous stories. First we look at a gal who was trying to get the attention of her beau while on a sport around town. You can access the audio version HERE

Woman pleads not guilty to stabbing driver

 

Next we move a little north of here, and look at a guy who really wanted to be Facebook Friends.

Facebook Friend Request Goes Really Bad

A while ago we brought you a story about the attorney general of South Dakota hitting and killing a man on his way home from a party. Well the gears of justice grind slow in this part of the country

 

Prosecutors waiting on debris testing in South Dakota AG crash

We go back and touch on the Tyson managers who were fired for making book on who would be the next ones to get the Rona.

Fired Tyson boss says COVID office pool was a ‘morale boost’

 

We eventually get to a story about dreams fulfilled.

Mississippi woman stabs husband after dreaming he cheated, police say

It’s at this time that we finally get to Florida. A Florida Woman is our target for a story that proves size matters

Woman slips out of handcuffs four times

Then to a Florida couple who decided to “Go visit Dad”

Deltona couple accused of stealing $180K from 87-year-old man before abandoning him, moving across country

So, this guy was just browsing in the phone store, for hours, looking at kiddie porn.

Employees at the AT&T store in Boulder, Colorado, were set to close for the day on April 18 when they went to clear the history of an iPad and discovered that a customer had spent four hours searching for child porn on the tablet

And we get to the final segment where we learn about St. Olga of Kiev. A Princess to admire.

Olga Kiev: The Princess Who Buried People Alive

That’s our show for the end  of the year from Hell. All of us at Happy Hour News Team would like to thank all of the people who put up with this nonsense. Especially Mrs. Pants who gets to wrangle 4 year olds and crazy bird dogs while we have our little fun time drinking and talking bullshit. And of course we want to thank all of the people who take time to listen to this madness. From all of us to all of our listeners, have a happy, safe, healthy, and fun new year.                                 PEACE!